do you sing or dance for your kids?

Last Saturday, March 15, we had our grade seven graduation party held at Sanville. Parents get to mingle with familiar faces and marvel at how their little girls have grown. Being in a small school, parents and children know well most of each other. Where can you find a school that call everybody 'titos' and 'titas'? Here in Paref schools, we are truly a family.

We had a simple dinner and program that is truly an affair to remember. The program was hosted by tito Mark and tita Giselle, while our hosts tito Nonoy and tita Rose were also gracious to have raffled off two paintings from their 'Walang Ingay 'art gallery. Watch out also for this young, talented musicians from Bulacan who rendered popular songs throughout the evening. They call themselves the Blue Cheese band! Some parents even sang onstage with the band that solicited wild applauses and cheers from everybody.

Highlights also of the evening were secret performances by Dads and Moms offered to their daughters for the occasion. Parents went out of their way to practice a few days before the event with some even having to practice only on that day. Kudos to everybody who made their daughters proud and happy that magical night in Mystic Rose drive.

Here's the footage of those performances:

Dads' Presentation: http://youtube.com/watch?v=rGEsipD3bwY

Moms' Presentation: http://youtube.com/watch?v=aqFFJT4W47c

would you consider a small school?

It is now summer and most of us parents are thinking of what school to send our young kids or perhaps transfer them. Of course there's the popular Ateneo, LaSalle, Poveda, Assumption, and others, just to name a few.

But would you consider a school where class population is only 25 to 32 kids per class?
How about a school who aside from the usual teaching of academics also give importance to the personal formation of each child?

Here, we know our kids' friends and parents pretty much. Some families have grown to be close to one another that they even go out on dinners or outings together. Parents band together in support of school activities while kids treat parents as their very own 'titos' and 'titas'. These schools are not just a learning place but also a home to all of us.

These are but some of the reasons why our daughters go to Rosehill in Antipolo and our son to Northfield. At the start, we knew Antipolo is far away from where we live in Quezon City but after seven years now, we feel happy and blessed with the schools that we have.

crying over delicious crepes and sundaes

As much as possible, we try to learn more about our children through family meetings. This would include follow up on each one's responsibility, opinion and other matters.

This time around, Suzette wanted to talk outside our home because she was not feeling too good after talking with our eldest daughter the other day regarding relationships. So off we went along Tomas Morato looking for a place where it's convenient to talk. At first people suggested coffee shops but I objected because Jiego and Ayi are not yet allowed to have coffee.

We end up choosing Cafe Breton so that the little ones can have some dessert. Isay and Jiego had huge ice cream sundaes, while Dang and Ayi chose mouth-watering dessert crepes. 'Zet and I had coffee, hot and cold in that order plus a little of this sundae and that crepe.

Mommy then brought out a short reading that consisted of a list of different emotions and wishes of a child and asked our kids to write on a sheet of paper what struck them the most and why. Yes, 'Zet had paper and pens with her.

At first the place had not so many customers and so the children were also cozy choosing and writing their notes from the list. Then one by one we talked to them and ask them while trying to understand why they chose that particular line from the list. First came Jiego who was in tears when we were asking him why he thinks we should give him more freedom. He couldn't answer us. And so my wife tried to pry it out by telling him the things and chores that he does and ask if this was his concern. After some sorting, we understood what he meant. He does not want to be nagged on his chores but since he does not remember to do them everyday, he instead requests for a short list on what needs to be done. The list he intends to leave it in a place in his room where he can see if often thus sparing him from Mom's wrath.

Children have many emotions inside them but what they say does not necessarily describe how they feel. It's hard enough to try to have good communication with them but understanding them is of a different level. I guess no matter how many parenting courses we attend and facilitate at, it's really hard to raise our children, what with each one having different personalities and needs. It is good though that we have learned some tools in dealing with them in actuality.

Take for example Dang, our second daughter. She was also in tears when she said that we are not giving much importance to her. My wife almost fell off her chair because I agree with her when she explained to her that we are not amiss in asking her what she needs and that we really try to accommodate their wants and needs. And so after some discussions we realize that when she is saying "no, it's okay mommy", it's really the other way around. For a while we thought that every thing's comfortable with her but now we realize that we should double check on her if we really understood her right.

By this time, the place is full already and many guests are glancing at our table every now and then because from the happy festive mood that we were from the start, our faces have turned up with red eyes and noses, tears rolling down and voices somewhat either in the upper tone or hushed mode. I'm glad that the joy of eating the wonderful desserts is keeping us from ever going more emotional than we already are.

Isay on the other hand wants us out of the house more often. She believes we should be out on dates or so because she feels affected whenever Dad and Mom have some disagreements. Perhaps she also probably suspects that we are falling out of love. Hmmmm?! Just after our talk about the other day this is what she chose over the other things on the list? Is this how they look at us now? I never realized that it made them feel uncomfortable and or troubled. And so it was a chance for us to explain more to her the intricacies of being in a relationship. And we assured them all that we are still very much in love. While we were taken aback by her letter, at least it too helped us calm down a bit as Suzette and I were also beginning to having some disagreements while handling our first two children that opened up that night.

By the time Ayi was ready, everybody was in a happy mood again. Ayi's simple wants and innocence made us cheerful once more. We wrapped up with resolutions and hope for the best that we can all stand by them.

After I asked for our bill, I can't help notice the face of our waiter. I am not sure if it's a sigh of relief that he's happy we are going or he's happy that all ended well with us. But sure enough after writing this blog about a week after it happened, we remained aware and understanding of what transpired that night.

the water horse

Last night, my wife and I together with Ayi went to visit Jay Tan's funeral. Jay is teacher Evelyn's eldest son who got a kidney transplant last December. He got an infection and so his body was not able to cope with it. He is known as the Round Mound of Sound or DJ Bounce to Magic 89.9 listeners. But to his friends and love ones, he is also known as Budoy.
Jay would sometimes be a host or a teacher to TCW's school activities that is why he is also well known among the active parents of the school.

Along the way, Suzette tells me about the blogs that Jay made which were compiled by his friends. She was there early that morning accompanying the preschool kids of TCW and told me how she was also crying at the chapel.

Funny but some few days ago I was thinking what to blog about next. For a while I thought I don't have anything meaningful to write about. Then I read Jay's blogs. He really has a talent for writing and I admire its contents. I get to know more about him while reading it and perhaps that's one reason why I'm here blogging again.

I enjoyed the mass service that evening, with the Vietnamese priest friend of the family from Sto Domingo church and a commentator/singer whom I believe is a professional who does this for a living. He has his own PA system with a pull trolley and an ipod nano attached to it that plays his mass service songs. He sings the responsorial psalm by memory and is very good and instrumental in setting the mood of the service. I can't help but notice the way he handled his part as it was very professional indeed. It's different from my first impression when at first I thought that he was just one of those usual party hosts. My wife even asked me to look for this person should she go away before me.

After the service, we left for SM Centerpoint. Ayi is excited that we will be able to finally have that movie date with her. We have our annual Kris Kringle game that our family play and the kids get to win prizes such as coffee date, movie date, etc. Ayi won that movie date but after the service, we were conditioning Ayi that we might have to postpone it because there is maybe no GP movie available and that it was also kind of getting late. I, too was sleepy from coming home late since Tuesday from many activities in our CFC community.
You can almost see the disappointment in her face.

At first, we saw some local films and action film posters and so we told her that they are not suitable for young kids. But at the end of the movie hallway, cinema 9 was showing the Water Horse. The poster looks cute enough for children so we convinced her to try this one. The last full show was set to start also at 9:30pm and my watch indicates that is is already 20 minutes past 9.

And so we entered the movie house just in time and noticed how only a handful was there to watch it. Our daughter seems very excited now from her previous noticeably more quiet stance. The film is about the legendary lochness monster and a boy who became friends with it. Ayi was kind of scared at the start but later becomes more comfortable as the story progresses. We saw the transformation of the 'creature' from an egg, to a baby to a full grown giant.

Somehow the film reminded me of the blogs that I read from Jay. Even though we see him in many of our kids activities, I don't really know him except from some impression that I have of him perhaps. Reading his writings allow me to know some dear part of him, his likes, his wishes and his aspirations. Much like the mysterious water horse creature whom the characters in the movie learned to understand and admire.

Oh, I would like to mention as an ender that we all enjoyed the movie, most especially Ayi who bragged about it for days to her siblings.

I was crying with Mr. Probinsiyanong Intsik

During my lunch break today, I get to watch the senate hearing regarding the ZTE anomaly. Mr. Rodolfo Lozada Jr. was there to answer the questions that the senators were giving him. I am deeply moved by this man's sincerity that you can feel in the way he talks and the emotions emanating with it. I'm happy that the senators were kind and respectful with the man who is being tested to the very core of his moral fiber.

What struck me was his narration of his trip to the countryside where he get to talk with the natives. Upon seeing the plentiful guava fruit bearing trees, he suggested that they can sell these fruits to the market so that they can earn money. The man, whom Mr. Lozada characterized as a poor nobody, said that they should just leave it for the birds. He was struck by this words and with this he is struggling with himself as to why there are some people who can bear to make kickbacks greedily. Of course I'm referring to the alleged US$329 Million overpricing of the Philippine broadband deal with China.

The hearing was moving enough to make one shed tears as I did while watching it. I have to send a text message to my wife, my mother-in-law and some friends regarding this sad event in our history. I am sad that we are helpless against the people whom we have elected to help build our nation. I am sad that there are people who really abuse their power and position to get even more powerful. I am sad that there are people who don't give a damn about our country.

But I was shedding tears because of the heroism of this man. I cried because I realize that there is hope despite all the goons in our government. I know this because there is still some people who try to give meaning in their lives. God help the Filipinos. God help the Philippines.

potty training moments

I cannot remember how successful we were in potty training our kids. Ayi being seven years old now has a long gap with Pio our youngest, who is now two years old. Sometimes when I take a bath, I bring Pio along and I would show him how daddy pee. But when I would ask him to try to imitate me, he would just shake his head and say 'wala', or that he does not feel it's time yet. Other times, he would try it and then I would hear pffffft followed by that foul smell, 'Ay utot lang' he would say with a sinister grin. Yes, we have funny moments inside the bathroom. He learned to poop first before peeing because it was easier to teach him. Whenever we see him groaning or moving his stomach we would run to sit him in the toilet seat. But to catch him before peeing is entirely different.

There is one particular day when we decided to take off his diapers and I told Pio face to face that if he feels he wants to pee, he should ask me or mommy to go to the toilet. Of course, he does not remember and we would only hear him say 'weewee' after he had just wet the floor. One day, I caught him holding onto his crouch that's when I realized he would pee. I brought him to our bathroom but just before I got his shorts off, he let go of his warm urine. I went down to his level and talked to him again face to face explaining that he should wait to take off his shorts before or else he would wet them. From that moment, he seems to understood it and the next one was a succesful pee to the bowl! My wife and I were clapping for him and he seems to enjoy our congratulations. The next day, Suzette called me over the phone to tell me the news that Pio went to pee four times without fail to the bathroom. One thing that helped her that day was scheduling Pio's trip to the bathroom.

The next day, Pio gets to go on a vacation to his lolo and lola in Paranaque. Suzette told them how the little boy is now doing it in the bathroom and so she suggested that the routine be duplicated there also as Pio will be there for a few days. Probably familiarity also is a factor in this that is why Pio would be uncooperative or would just say 'wala' to them. Lolo Tony however was clever to encourage our son to show off how he pees to Maui! And so, every now and then, Pio would pee in their grassy lawn in front of Maui, the dog in Paranaque.

Feast of the Black Nazarene

After bringing my children to school, I went directly to the office to park my car. I then proceeded to walk towards minor basilica of St. John the baptist also known as Quiapo church where I annually attend mass this time of the year. Incidentally, it is also the birthday of St. Josemaria Escriva, founded of the Opus Dei whom I also pray novena to.
I arrived near the vicinity of the church at Ronquillo and Carriedo streets before 7 am. It is usually orderly during this hours but the crowd is already building up. I had a hard time getting through the crowd because the I ended up moving with the wave that is also head on with a crowd going out of the church. I have to backtrack and turn to an alley that puts me on another mob trail that wants to get inside the church. After about twenty minutes, I am in the middle of Plaza Miranda and can hear the mass from there. A giant monitor was also setup so that others can see the celebration inside. Archbishop Cardinal Gaudencio Rosales was officiating the mass.

Little by little I'm inching closer to the entrance doors amidst the sea of people that have some groups going in and some going out of the church. A lady and her companions were complaining that they are heading towards the church again instead of their intentions of going at the back of the church altar to touch the Nazarene. This is one of the problems here. Because of the crowd, you cannot see the steel railings that has been placed to control the traffic of people to the church. Even the signs "Pasukan" at "Labasan" on the rails is hardly noticeable until you are about three to five meters away. It's too late to move to the other side if you fail to notice them.

I found the chance to enter the church during communion when some people have also started to come out while many also seized the opportunity to create another wave towards the entrance. By the end of the final blessing, I was already inside right beside a mom who took her five or six month old daughter. "Sayang" or so I thought, the cardinal started his mass early this year. Although the new priest coming out to celebrate the next mass is quite familiar. And at about 7:30, Bishop Teodoro Bacani started celebrating the mass. Wow, all archbishops and bishops are here to celebrate with the mass and fiesta. I was quite comfortable in the duration of the mass as I was lucky that I am able to place myself in front of one of the wall fans working overtime today.

During communion, I have some hesitation to take it on the left side of the church on where I was because the aides where asking to people to leave the church right after receiving the host. This is because I want to receive the final blessings also inside the church. I scan around and can see that it's almost the same everywhere but I decided to cross to the middle where at least the exit path will be longer and thus have a better chance of hearing the final blessings inside.

I excused myself from the people sitting and kneeling at the pews where I passed with no effort. And as expected, I was led to exit at the middle aisle after communion and was slowly walking toward the back exit with the others. Just before hitting the turn towards the door, the bishop gave his final blessing and I paused to say my final prayers. And after the mass was finished, I cannot move an inch as people started to dart toward the middle aisle. Lay ministers were sprinkling holy water to the people who have raised their hands with their rosaries, novena booklets, images of the Sto. Nino and the Black Nazarene and even handkerchiefs. I too, picked my rosary from my pocket and joined with the crowd.

Going out takes a shorter time than going in but the effort is double. I am caught in the lane of two opposing groups with one moving in while I'm at the edge of another crowd going out. My shirt is being snagged from other people's bags or fans while trying to control my balance from the pushing and the shoving of other people. I can feel the cool winds of January is still here when I look up and grasp for air but my head and body is already hot and sweating from the effort of moving towards the welcome sight of Carriedo streets.

By 8:45 I'm already at Avenida. I feel very hungry so I decided to have a quick meal. All three Jollibee stores that I passed by are full when then I noticed a new Tropical Hut in the area. I proceeded inside and placed my order. It isn't until the food was served that I noticed the claim number that the cashier has given me that I request the server to hold on while I take a picture before they take the number tag. Why, it's the number 9! Cool isn't it? Call me corny but hey I like corny. Sometimes I take them as signs or assurance that things will be better. I take this time of the year to thank God for all the blessings my family received and as well as for giving me another year here on earth. So, yes I take that as a sign from God that He was listening to my prayers. At lunch time my wife called me that she noticed the crawling vines that we planted about five months ago has started to bloom. Now, that's another sign and He's telling me I am not corny. Believe!